What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Randomize
