his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
