so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
