I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
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