guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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