You smell like stripper and shame
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
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