Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
