Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
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