if i can run in heels then i can drive
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize