I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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