he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
