New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize