Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
