i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
