You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
