Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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