That's when you crack a 10am beer
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize