the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
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