the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize