dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
The Olympian is in my bed
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