dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
