Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
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