ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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