the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
