Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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