We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I can't turn off my feet"
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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