I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
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