so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
