I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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