yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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