i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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