You made me cry and you don't even care
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I just got carded by a ten year old.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
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