I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
