hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Randomize