Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
