What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize
