Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
