8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I could make wine with my vomit
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
