wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
