Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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