Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Randomize