is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
