Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
