we're blogging at a bar
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
