its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
