Fuck appropriateness.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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