What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
