I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize