I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I supernannyed him into submission
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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