yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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