I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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