I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
